Skeptics and True Believers
by Solace Requiem
Summary: Trowa is just your not-so-average college student that wants to make it big in the music industry with his band. Will his secret test his relationships and hurt his chances in music? Trans!Trowa AU; yaoi 2x3, 1x4, 5x?x5
1. Liars Turn Me On

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Gundam Wing (sadly), nor do I make any money by writing this. The lyrics and song performed in the fic belong to the band The Cab, and are from a song titled "Bounce". The title of this fic is taken from the song of the same name by The Academy Is…

**Warnings**: Language, shounen ai/yaoi, adult themes, FTM transgender issues, eventual sexual content

Beta'd by the lovely Mnlight Requiem.

_Note_: I've wanted to write a fic concerning FTM (or Female-to-Male) transitioning for a long time, but I couldn't really decide how to go about writing it. For this fic, I drew inspiration from author frk_werewolf 's _You Only See What I Let You See,_ a Panic! At the Disco trans!fic written on LiveJournal back in 2008. I was also inspired by _The Chains We Wear_ by LadyKeinKhan on Adult Fan Fiction, though it's quite different. If you decide to read _The Chains We Wear_, PLEASE read all of the warnings listed. Saying that it's rough is an understatement. Also, please keep in mind that I am not an expert by any means in transitioning, and though I did plenty of research beforehand, research only gets you so far. Any and all constructive criticism is welcome.

_Another note_: In this 'verse, the five guys were born 1989-1990. Also, it's not mentioned yet, but the location that this fanfic takes place in is Denton, Texas, and the boys attend the University of North Texas, or UNT

* * *

**Skeptics and True Believers- Chapter One**

_October 14, 2004_

Trina and Quatre sat on the floor of Quatre's bedroom, schoolbooks spread out around them as they attempted to work together on a World Geography assignment. Quatre had been biting at his lower lip since they arrived at the house after school and Trina knew something was up with her best friend. She couldn't put her finger on it, but she knew there was something on his mind that he wanted to talk about.

"Quatre." Quatre jerked his head up from the textbook in his lap, having been staring at it with his brows furrowed without really reading anything for a good five minutes.

"Huh?"

Trina shook her head and smiled softly, her chestnut bangs hanging slightly over one of her eyes. "If you keep staring like that, you're gonna burn a hole through the textbook. What's wrong?"

Quatre flushed and ducked his head, letting his blonde bangs fall over his face and hide his aquamarine colored eyes. "There's something I wanna tell you, but... I don't know."

Trina frowned a little. "Talk to me, Quat."

Quatre stared down at his lap, fiddling with his hands. "I'm not sure how to tell you this. I've been having these feelings for a while. I… I'm not sure I'm going to ever have a girlfriend."

Trina moved the textbook out of Quatre's lap and scooted closer on the carpet, gently tilting his face up to look at her. His cheeks were pink and his eyes were watery, his teeth back to chewing his lower lip.

"I know." At Trina's words, Quatre instantly relaxed and slid one hand down to squeeze his best friend's free hand. Trina sucked in a breath and squeezed back, knowing that it was only fair to tell Quatre what she'd known about herself since she was a little kid but never acknowledged out-loud to anyone. She let her hand slip from Quatre's chin and looked away.

"Me too."

Quatre made a surprised little noise. "You are? But- you like that Alex guy in our band class."

"Yeah."

Quatre stayed quiet for a minute and moved so that Trina and he were face to face.

"Trina? Are you bi?"

Trina winced. "No." A surge of fear made her voice catch in the back of her throat. Trina swallowed hard and gathered her thoughts before lifting her head just enough to look at Quatre from behind her mess of light brown hair.

"I don't feel right. I don't belong in this body. It feels _wrong_." Trina didn't miss the confusion that filled Quatre's eyes or the way that he tilted his head slightly to the side.

"What do you mean 'it feels wrong'?"

The tall girl sitting across from Quatre gave him a tiny, scared smile. "I'm not supposed to be a girl, Quatre. I've known that since I was old enough to tell the difference between the other girls and boys." Trina was surprised she was able to keep her voice as steady as she did; she was terrified that she just lost her best friend for telling him about her gender dysphoria.

Quatre's eyes widened. Sure, he knew Trina didn't act like any other girl he had met, but he didn't expect her to confess that her body and mind didn't coincide. He took in his best friend's appearance and frowned softly; Trina's hands were shaking and her face was pale, and Quatre could tell how afraid she was. He reached out and took her other trembling hand into his own, giving both hands a firm squeeze.

"If you feel like you're a boy, then that's who you are. You're my best friend, and I'm not going anywhere."

Trina took in a sharp breath and squeezed the blonde's hands tightly. She gave the other boy a smile so wide it could've split her face, and for the first time she truly felt free.

* * *

_January 17, 2009_

Trowa hated his body.

Maybe not hate; hate was a bit too strong of a word to describe how he felt. But it most certainly felt _wrong_. The soft curve of his hips, the slightly fuller swell of his ass, and those _breasts_. It was those two lumps of excess fat on his chest that he couldn't stand more than anything. They weren't overly large, if anything they were average and perky; Trowa was a solid 32 B cup, though he hadn't actually worn a bra since early June. But the fact of the matter was that he wasn't supposed to have a body with breasts. He wasn't supposed to be _female_. And here he was, someone with a woman's body when his brain screamed male. And he'd be damned if he'd stay this way forever.

For as long as he could remember, Trowa knew that the body he was born into didn't match how he felt on the inside. When he was a child, it was something that scared the hell out of him, but he could manage. People took him for a tomboy and he was okay with that; he had absolutely no interest in girly things like Barbie dolls or playing dress-up with his mommy's clothes or makeup. Roughhousing with the boys in his grade had been no problem, and on the rare occasion that a boy decided Trowa couldn't play with them because he was a girl, the kid usually ended up with a black eye.

Then came the summer before starting sixth grade; he was going through a growth spurt, but along with it came other changes to his body. When middle school started that fall, all of the boys that had treated him as "one of the guys" suddenly became aware that even though Trowa was a tomboy, holy shit he had breasts now that they couldn't possibly ignore. Trowa hated the constant reminders of being female that his body gave him, from those stupid breasts right down to the monthly bleeding between his legs that other eleven-year-old girls would brag about starting.

Trowa stood in the bathroom of the apartment he shared with his roommate and stared at himself in the mirror above the sink. His light brown hair fell in an asymmetrical yet boyish hair cut, his bangs hanging over one of his forest green eyes. It was still messy from sleep, but nothing he couldn't handle fixing with a brush. Sighing to himself, Trowa ran the tips of his fingers over his right cheek, sliding his hand down his chin and neck. It wasn't very noticeable, but there was a definite "peach fuzz" of stubble beginning to grow. It had been about six months since he started his testosterone shots, and he was beginning to see and feel a change in his body. The biggest difference was his voice. Trowa never had a very high voice to begin with, but to him it was the one "tell" about himself that he couldn't really hide. Around those who weren't privy to his secret, he often kept conversation to a minimum. But in the last three months the tone of his voice had shifted down several pitches and Trowa couldn't be happier. His voice still had a bit of airiness to it, but otherwise it was a smooth tenor that didn't sound the least bit feminine.

He allowed his gaze to shift lower in the mirror, his lips pursed in a tight expression as he looked at the breasts he usually kept hidden from himself and the rest of the world. They stood there, bare and perky and still the same size that they were before starting his weekly injections. He had hoped that they would have started to shrink a little by now, but he knew that most of the changes his body needed to undergo wouldn't start happening for several more months. For now, Trowa had to settle with keeping them bound with an ace bandage until either the T shrunk them down a bit or he could afford to have top surgery to remove his breasts. He tore his gaze away from the mirror and grabbed the nude binding fabric from where it lay on the vanity next to the faded grey tee he had slept in, having taken off the bandage to sleep. With a few quick motions Trowa had the material wrapped around his chest and secure, the swell of his breasts now successfully flat.

A sudden knock to the bathroom door nearly made Trowa jump out of his skin. He fumbled a little, tugging on his shirt before clearing his throat and opening the door. Quatre stood in the hallway with a bright smile on his face, clad in a pair of silk pajama pants and a loose fitting t-shirt and a spatula in hand. And from the smell wafting down the hallway, he had just finished making breakfast.

"Good morning, Trowa! Breakfast is ready, whenever you're hungry."

Trowa couldn't help but return his roommate's infectious smile. "Thanks, Quatre."

He and Quatre had been best friends since the start of high school just over four years ago, back when Trowa's name was still Trina, and ever since they moved into their two-bedroom apartment together during the summer, Quatre had made it a point to fix breakfast every morning before heading out to their college classes or band practice. Not that Trowa minded; Quatre loved to cook and Trowa could barely manage to scramble eggs without ruining the frying pan.

Trowa smoothed out his knee-length athletic shorts and shut off the bathroom light before following his roommate into the little dining area connected to the kitchen. Quatre had already set out two plates of pancakes and bacon and the carton of orange juice with two empty juice glasses sat waiting in the center of the rounded table. Trowa sat down and poured himself a glass of juice as well as one for the blonde standing in the kitchen nook, chatting animatedly on his cell. When Quatre hung up and sat across from Trowa, the taller boy was already chewing on a slice of bacon while cutting up his pancakes. Trowa swallowed and took a swig of his juice.

"What's up?"

"That was Wufei, and he said for us to come over an hour earlier for practice today. A friend of Heero's from his music theory class is auditioning."

Trowa made a surprised noise. Quatre and Trowa were in a band with Quatre's boyfriend Heero and their friend Wufei. Up until now Heero managed to handle singing along with playing the guitar, but he knew that he'd be better off choosing one or the other. So, at the beginning of the month they started searching for a new vocalist, and so far they hadn't had much luck. Any audition was welcome at this point.

"Yeah? What's his name?"

Quatre dug into his meal, careful not to make a mess. "Duo Maxwell, I think."

"Huh." Trowa shrugged. The two ate their breakfast in a comfortable silence, both wondering about how practice would turn out. When they were finished, they carried out their usual morning routine. Trowa would wash the dishes and cooking utensils while Quatre hopped into the shower, and every morning Trowa would be dressed and ready to go well before his roommate. Not that he minded.

* * *

When Trowa and Quatre arrived at Wufei's house just before ten o'clock, Wufei stood outside the open garage door muttering to himself. "This damn thing better be worth getting woken up at seven am." Quatre laughed and patted Wufei on the shoulder lightly, Trowa carrying his bass guitar to the garage where the rest of the instruments were set up. So far, there was no sign of Heero or this Duo Maxwell character.

As if on cue, a red Jeep Wrangler pulled up in the vacant spot on the driveway, a boy with piercing blue eyes and short messy chocolate hair hopping out of the driver's seat. He walked over and let Quatre sneak in a tiny kiss to his lips. Another boy bounced out of the passenger seat of the Jeep and waved happily at the others. Trowa's heart nearly stopped as he turned around from setting up his guitar; the other boy was _gorgeous_. He donned a long brunette braid stopping just above his waist, clad in a purple V-neck tee and black skinny jeans that hugged his lower body in all the right places. But what nearly had Trowa gasping for air were the boys eyes, a beautiful cobalt blue with just a hint of violet. He'd never seen anything quite like it. Trowa swallowed and rubbed his hands on the outside thighs of his jeans and decided he'd better walk over to where the other four were standing.

The new boy rocked on the balls of his feet and grinned at the group. "Hi, I'm Duo Maxwell! Nice to meetcha!" He held his hand out to Trowa first, and the taller boy felt his throat go dry again as he shook Duo's hand.

"Likewise." Duo shook Wufei and Quatre's hands, chatting idly and getting to know his new companions. Heero had mentioned the group offhand when he brought up their band needing a singer, and Duo all but jumped at the chance to set up an audition.

Wufei used a hand to cover up a yawn. "Alright, Maxwell. Let's see what you've got."

The five boys made their way into the large garage. Quatre turned on his keyboard and synthesizer, humming softly while the Heero and Trowa made sure their guitars were in tune and plugged into the amps. Wufei settled behind his drum kit, drumming out a quick rhythm. Quatre hooked up a microphone and handed it to Duo, giving him a soft smile. "Shall we start with a cover?"

Duo took the mic and smiled brightly. "Sure! Did you guys have something in mind?"

Heero adjusted his own microphone and shrugged. "How about 'Bounce?'"

Duo gave Heero a wolfish grin. "Liars do turn me on, after all." With a snort from Heero in response, Wufei tapped out the opening rhythm to the song.

Trowa nearly gasped when Duo started singing. His voice rolled out in a sultry baritone, sending shivers up Trowa's spine. He glanced over at Quatre, who looked just as surprised as Trowa at the beautiful voice coming out of the new boy. No one had expected him to sing so well, and for a minute even Heero and Wufei almost faulted with their instruments. By the first chorus of the song, the five were playing with such perfect sync that everyone knew this was the way it was meant to be; everything clicked.

At the last phrase of the song, Duo locked eyes with Trowa as he sang those words: _"And when you use your lips, they better be on me."_ Trowa felt a shudder run through his body and his cheeks pinken, but he didn't turn his gaze from the other boy. They finished the song and Duo spun on his toes to face everyone. He wore the same impish grin from earlier as he took in everyone's expressions, a mix of happiness, satisfaction, and even a bit of surprise.

"So, did I pass?"

The other four boys exchanged glances, nodding in agreement. Quatre gave Duo a genuine smile. "Welcome to the band."

* * *

_February 25, 2009_

"Have you told him yet?"

Trowa jerked his head up from his biology textbook and looked at Wufei. Wufei didn't even look up from his notebook, his glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. He had come over to Trowa and Quatre's apartment under the guise of studying together for their upcoming midterm on Friday, but Trowa quickly realized that studying wasn't the only thing the Chinese man had in mind.

"Told him what?"

Wufei snorted. "You know damn well what I'm talking about, Barton."

Trowa sighed and crossed his arms, closing his eyes to avoid Wufei's gaze when the man looked up from his notes. "Not yet."

It had been almost six weeks since Duo joined their band Sandrock, and things had been going as well as any of the boys could've hoped for. New music was finally getting written, as were lyrics, and all five guys often spent their time together on campus between classes. They were preparing for an upcoming gig at the campus pub the first week of March right before Spring Break, and it was no secret that Duo was the most excited. It was his first show with his new band mates. Their rapport was easy, perfect, and Trowa didn't want to ruin it. Not with Duo.

Wufei wasn't stupid. He knew there was a mutual attraction between Trowa and Duo, yet neither man said anything directly about it to one another. Before Duo joined the band, Trowa had kept mostly to himself when the four would get together for practice or to write music. It wasn't that he wasn't comfortable around Heero or Wufei. He was; he was just naturally a quiet, low-key person. But since Duo has been around, Trowa had slowly started opening up a little bit more, adding more to their group conversations.

"Trowa. It's been six weeks. Heero and I knew almost instantly."

Trowa narrowed his eyes at Wufei. "That was different, and you know it."

The Chinese boy snorted and took off his glasses, setting them down with his notes and textbook. Trowa was right; circumstances were different with him and Heero finding out about Trowa's body. When they all met in August, Trowa had only been on testosterone for a little over a month and was still awkward with his beginning stages of transitioning. He tried to hide it, but his voice would crack at the most inopportune times; he felt and sounded like a young boy going through puberty. But for some reason, it didn't faze Heero or Wufei a bit and they took his transitioning in stride.

"That may be so, but it doesn't change the fact that you need to tell him."

Trowa threw his hands up and let out an exasperated sigh. "What do you want me to say? 'Good morning, Duo. By the way, I'm transgendered, how's your day going?' Be realistic, Wufei." He slumped forward a little in his chair, letting his hands fall back onto the table. "What if he thinks I'm too much of a freak and quits?"

Wufei frowned and moved so he was sitting closer to Trowa. Trowa twitched a little when Wufei rested his hand on the other boy's left forearm, but didn't pull away from the touch. "You're not a freak." Wufei sighed and tucked a loose clump of his fine black hair behind his ear. "You're Trowa Barton, and you're a man. It's not your fault that you were born into the wrong body. And if Maxwell can't see past that, then we'll find a new singer."

Trowa gave Wufei a weak smile and ran his fingers through his hair.

"I guess you're right. But let me tell him on my own terms, okay? Right now, I just want to worry about this damn midterm and the show next week."

Onyx eyes met emerald, and Wufei sighed. "Fine." He just hoped the taller boy's plans didn't turn around and bite him in the ass.


	2. One of THOSE Nights

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Gundam Wing (sadly), nor do I make any money by writing this. The song mentioned belongs to Fall Out Boy. The title of this fic is taken from the song of the same name by The Academy Is…

**Warnings**: Language, shounen ai/yaoi, adult themes, FTM transgender issues, eventual sexual content

Beta'd by the incredibly amazing The Manwell.

* * *

**Skeptics and True Believers- Chapter Two**

_March 5, 2009_

"Trowa, are you okay?"

Trowa opened his eyes and glanced up at Quatre. He felt miserable, and from the worry on his roommate's face he must have looked just as bad as he felt. Trowa was curled up on the couch, wrapped up in a big, fluffy burgundy blanket with only his head sticking out. His skin was pale and clammy to the touch, and he couldn't shake the dizziness clouding his head. But the worst of it was the pain. A sharp throbbing sensation stabbed at Trowa's stomach from the inside out, radiating up the small of his back. Nausea from the pain came in waves, and he could already feel the beginnings of a migraine in the base of his skull.

Trowa almost wished he had the flu; he'd have an excuse to hole himself up in his bedroom and have Quatre take care of him until the sickness passed. But he wasn't so lucky. No, what Trowa had, in his eyes, was much worse.

Every month since starting testosterone, Trowa expected his menstrual cycle to have stopped. Since starting bi-monthly group therapy sessions back in August, he'd come to know several other trans men and women, all ranging in various stages of transitioning. Most men he'd spoken with had stopped having their periods around month six of starting hormone replacement therapy, but Trowa was ending month eight and was _still_ bleeding. His doctor said that nothing was wrong with his body and that every person reacts differently to transitioning. It didn't change the fact that Trowa was annoyed, though. His periods were always painful, even before he had started the injections, but this time it seemed different. He never felt this _weak_.

"Can you fix me a hot water bottle, Quat? I'm too dizzy to get up."

Quatre made a sympathetic noise and ran into the kitchen, Trowa listening as his roommate flipped the tap on the sink and waited for the water to heat up. Trowa knew that the other boy was worried about his wellbeing. He always had bad cramping and migraines during his time of the month and over the years Quatre had witnessed the pain on multiple occasions, but Trowa didn't think that the blonde had ever seen him this sick before. Generally, days two and three were always the worst and that afternoon marked day two. That meant tomorrow would be just as bad, if not worse.

When Quatre walked out of the kitchen, hot water bottle and towel in hand, the sick boy had his eyes shut tight and was shifting uncomfortably, trying to find a way to relieve some of the pain. Quatre carefully moved the blanket his best friend was cocooned inside of and wrapped the hot water bottle in the dishtowel, gingerly placing it against Trowa's lower stomach.

Trowa hissed softly at the pressure of the bottle and let his head drop back against the worn out black leather of the couch as Quatre wrapped him back up in the warm blanket. He hated that he was so damn pathetic like this.

"Thanks."

Trowa wrapped his arms around his chest protectively under the burgundy material, trying to ignore the sensitive feeling of his unbound breasts underneath his thin t-shirt. He bit down on his bottom lip to keep a tiny whimper from escaping; of course _they_ had to be tender too.

Quatre sighed and sat down in the armchair closest to Trowa, crisscrossing his legs underneath himself.

"Maybe I should take you into the emergency room. You look awful, Trowa."

"I'll be fine. We have a show tomorrow, remember?"

Quatre groaned and rubbed his forehead. "There's no way that you can play in your condition. We'll postpone the show to after Spring Break."

"Hell no. Duo's been looking forward to this for _weeks_."

Trowa knew that he shouldn't push himself; there would always be other shows in the future. It wasn't like the gig on campus was a big deal, anyway, but Trowa couldn't help remembering how ecstatic Duo was when the band managed to book a set at The Pub. Duo's entire body radiated exuberance, and it made Trowa's heart swell.

He turned his gaze back to the blonde perched on the armchair, and the other boy clearly was not happy with Trowa's decision.

"Fine, but you're not going to practice today. Don't _even_ think about arguing." Quatre narrowed his eyes into a fierce glare and his jaw tightened, leaning forward slightly in his chair.

A tiny "eep" escaped Trowa and he shut his mouth, not saying another word. Quatre could be damned scary when he wanted to be.

* * *

Duo was sprawled on his stomach on the floor of Wufei's living room, sketching only God knows what, when Quatre arrived. If Wufei was unnerved, then Quatre could only imagine what was going through Heero's head.

"I'm telling you, guys, matching outfits would be fucking _sweet_. We can totally rock the spandex, and- oh, hi guys!" Duo stopped mid-flail and sat up, frowning when only Quatre walked through the entryway. "Where's Tro-man?"

Quatre flopped onto the couch next to Heero and snuggled close, sighing as he rested his head on Heero's shoulder. A strong arm wrapped around the blonde's waist as he made himself comfortable. He wasn't sure how he was going to explain Trowa's absence to Duo; the longhaired brunette was still in the dark.

"He's sick, so I made him stay home."

Wufei quirked a brow at Quatre and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Sick with what? He was just fine yesterday."

Quatre narrowed his eyes and gave Wufei his best "not now" look. The Chinese boy stared at the blonde in confusion for a few seconds when his eyes widened, pulling a face and looking away.

Duo was thoroughly confused at the interaction between Wufei and Quatre. Something was going on, something that was purposely being kept from him and he wanted to know why. He felt something had been… off for a few weeks now, with Trowa, and he had planned on cornering the other boy that afternoon after practice. The tall boy always seemed to be at some sort of doctor's appointment, and when Duo had asked Heero about it in Music Theory, the other boy just said it was "nothing serious" and refused to elaborate any further.

"Is Tro gonna be okay?"

Quatre gave Duo a soft smile. "He'll be fine, just some stomach problems. He swears he'll be okay by tomorrow night."

Duo arched a brow and flicked his braid over his shoulder, letting it fall against his back.

"We can postpone, ya know. It'd give us more time to put together our outfits."

Quatre lifted his head from Heero's shoulder and frowned.

"Outfits?"

"Yeah! See, look." Duo walked on his knees over to where Quatre was cuddled with his boyfriend and handed the blonde the spiral-bound notebook he had been drawing on earlier. Quatre took the sketchpad from the other boy and when his eyes fell on the picture, his blonde brows shot up on his forehead.

Looking up at Quatre from the page were five boys clad in tight pants- Quatre couldn't tell if they were supposed to be jeans, leather or spandex- and varying degrees of near shirtlessness. Quatre couldn't help but burst into laughter, his entire body shaking in amusement. Next to him, Heero took the spiral and stared at the drawing, his brows furrowing into a look of displeasure before handing the pad of paper back to Duo.

"No."

Duo pouted and dropped the sketchpad to the floor, hopping to his feet. "Oh, come on, man. I bet Trowa would go for it!"

Wufei rolled his eyes as he recrossed his legs.

"Maxwell, you're the only one who could possibly want to go out like that on stage. I'm not wearing _that_."

Quatre brushed away a tear from his cheek, having calmed down from his fit of laughter. "Sorry, Duo. Let's just stick with jeans and t-shirts."

Duo sighed and flopped into the free chair next to Wufei. "Fine." Saying he was disappointed that he wouldn't be seeing Trowa in tight spandex was more than an understatement.

* * *

_March 6, 2009_

The UNT campus was mostly deserted when Trowa arrived the following evening, everyone without Friday classes having already taken off to get an early start on Spring Break. After a _very_ persuasive conversation with his best friend (one which may have involved Quatre threatening to put the taller boy under house arrest with his father's company's head of security, Rashid), Trowa opted to run through the set list on his own at the apartment while the rest of the guys set things up at the campus bar. The pain in his stomach continued to scorch through his body and his head throbbed, but the nausea had tapered off and he could walk without getting dizzy or light headed. He still wasn't too sure how the actual concert would fair, but seeing Duo happy would more than make up for the pain.

With a soft grunt, Trowa slid gingerly out of his car and carefully hefted his bass guitar case from the back seat. His upper body strength was near nonexistent, and as Trowa made his way to the Student Union building he found himself second-guessing the decision to go on with the show. He groaned when he walked over to the outside staircase leading up to the bar area of the SU and opted for the long, handicapped accessible ramp that led up to the same place; there was no way he could handle walking up such a long stretch of stairs as weak as he was feeling.

Trowa wrestled open the door to The Pub with his free hand. Lady Gaga's voice filtered through the jumbled chatter of students cluttered around the bar and tables, the warm atmosphere drawing the tall boy inside. He easily spotted Quatre and the rest of his friends on the small stage on the opposite side of the venue. The four boys were still fiddling with their instruments and various equipment needed for the show. Duo was the first to see Trowa make his way over to the stage and the braided boy smiled- bright and infectious- waving animatedly as Trowa walked over and climbed onto the stage.

"Hey, man!" As Trowa moved closer, Duo took in the other boy's appearance and his smile fell. Trowa's skin held an ashy paleness to it, and his normally vibrant emerald green eyes looked dull and muted.

"Dude. You look like shit."

Trowa snorted and laid his guitar case down on the concrete of the stage, squatting down and unlocking the tabs. He flipped open the case, carefully easing out his bass guitar.

"Thanks, Duo. Exactly what I wanted to hear before the show."

Duo waved a hand and squatted down next to Trowa, grabbing the cord to connect the bass to one of the amps.

"You sure you're up to this? We can still bail, ya know."

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about me." Trowa gave Duo the biggest grin he could muster, the expression not quite reaching his eyes, and he slowly stood back up.

Duo followed suit, brushing off the thighs of his worn out whitewashed jeans. He watched as Trowa wasted no time in connecting his bass to the amplifier and stood the guitar in its stand next to Heero's. Duo let his eyes wander from Trowa to where the other three guys stood. Quatre was talking animatedly to Heero near his synthesizer and keyboards, and the dark haired boy's lips held a soft smile reserved only for the blonde.

Trowa made his way over to where Wufei was sitting bored-ly behind his drum kit, twirling one of his drumsticks with his fingers. When the Chinese boy noticed the other boy walking toward him, he offered a small smile.

"You ready, Barton?"

Trowa nodded and ran a hand through his hair, fixing his messy bangs. "As ready as I'm going to be, I suppose. You?"

Wufei laughed, drumming out a beat with the wooden sticks in his hands on his thighs. The boy was nervous, probably more so than the rest of the group. It was odd; Wufei was never nervous like this before a show. But deep in the pit of his stomach, he had a feeling of dread. He couldn't put his finger on it, but something told him that something bad would happen that night.

"Always," Wufei told Trowa nonchalantly, brushing aside his bad feeling about the concert.

Trowa shrugged and glanced over as Quatre and Heero walked over with Duo right behind, the braided boy bouncing with nerves and excitement.

"Let's do our best, guys!"

The boys nodded in agreement and made their way to their respective areas on stage, Heero and Trowa securing their guitars around their bodies while Quatre synced up his synthesizer. The bar radio was silenced and feet shuffled their way over to stand at the stage, students curious to see what college band was performing.

Duo grinned over at Trowa and grasped his microphone, removing it from the stand.

"Hey guys, we're Sandrock! You're in for one hell of a show."

With that, Quatre queued up his synthesizer and Wufei kicked out the opening rhythm of the band's opening song, starting off with a somewhat electronic cover of "Sugar, We're Goin' Down" to get the crowd going. Duo danced across the stage, his braid swinging behind him. Watching Duo's movements on the stage, Trowa found himself relaxing. His fingers plucked the strings of his bass fluidly, letting his eyes slip shut as he was consumed by the music. Duo pranced over to Trowa and sang into the other boy's microphone, and before Trowa could register what was happening, Duo placed a wet kiss to his cheek and bounced off to the other side of the stage. Trowa's fingers faltered slightly and he felt his face flush, but he quickly recovered and let the song come to a close.

Heero shared a grin with Duo and his fingers plucked the opening riff of the next song, one of the very first original songs Sandrock had written with Duo in the band. The crowd in front of the stage had grown incredibly huge. People were having to stand up at tables closer to the bar just to be able to see. The atmosphere in the air was enough to nearly choke Duo up a little, not having expected to receive such an overwhelming response from the other students on campus. The longhaired boy was beaming brighter than Trowa could even imagine, and he knew that not canceling the show had been the right thing to do.

By the fourth song, Trowa felt fatigue begin to set in. A cold sweat ran down his forehead and neck, dripping onto the soft cotton of his black scoop neck t-shirt. He tried to ignore the pain searing through his abdomen and concentrate on playing his bass, but the cramps were continuing to grow worse. He straightened his back so that he wasn't so hunched over his instrument, attempting to relieve the pressure building in his stomach and lower back. A particularly strong wave of pain seized through his body and he stumbled on his feet.

"Fuck," he mumbled under his breath as he regained his footing.

He looked up from focusing on playing and Duo's gaze snared him. The other boy continued to sing, but Trowa could see confusion in those cobalt eyes. Trowa shook it off and returned his attention back to the music playing around him. He focused on the chords, on the rhythm, shoving everything else out of his mind. A particularly heavy bass section was coming up, and Trowa knew he'd have to use all of his remaining energy in getting it right.

Trowa gritted his teeth as his belly cramped tight. His fingers faltered and he stumbled again, a wave of dizziness overtaking his senses.

Tears pricked behind Trowa's eyes from the pain, and he quickly blinked them away; he refused to cry over it, especially in front of Duo and the countless familiar faces from campus. His fingers trembled against the strings of his guitar and his vision was swimming. He couldn't breathe, his knees weak, and he was falling- everything seemed to slow down right before hearing a loud thud and a sharp pain shot through the back of his skull.

"Trowa!"

Everything faded to black.

* * *

The bar was in complete chaos. Patrons ran in every direction, some not sure if they should leave while others swarmed around the stage wanting to see what happened to the boy sprawled on his back, bass half on top of his unconscious body. Duo's microphone fell abandoned to the stage floor, a sharp squeal piercing through the sound system, but he didn't care. He rushed to Trowa's side, the three other boys following suit. Duo carefully freed the boy of his guitar and tried not to panic as he sank to his knees next to Trowa.

"Someone call an ambulance! Fuck!"

Wufei fumbled for his cell phone and dialed 9-1-1, struggling to stay calm while he told the operator what happened and where they were. Heero wrapped his arms around Quatre, trying to keep the blonde boy from freaking out.

An ambulance was three minutes out, three minutes that felt like an eternity. Duo didn't know what to do for Trowa. The boy passed was out on the cold concrete of the stage. Duo desperately wanted to hold him, but was afraid to move him in case he had hurt his head or neck in the fall. Instead Duo gripped one of Trowa's hands; the skin was cold and sticky with sweat but he refused to let go.

Two paramedics rushed into the bar and over to the stage, students who were still watching the scene unfold steering clear so that the two men could wheel through a stretcher. Reluctantly, Duo stood up and stepped out of the paramedics' way. He shoved his shaking hands into his pockets and rocked on the balls of his feet, watching intently as the medics assessed Trowa.

"He's tachycardic, let's get him in a neck brace and on the stretcher and start a saline drip." One of the men looked away from Trowa and at the four waiting boys standing behind him. "Which one of you is riding with him?"

"I will." Duo stepped forward, watching as the medic held Trowa's head while the other fastened the brace around Trowa's neck. The two men carefully slid a board underneath Trowa, using it to stabilize the boy's body and lift him onto the waiting gurney.

Wufei rested a hand on Duo's left shoulder, his eyes surprisingly soft when Duo turned his head to look at the Chinese boy.

"Let Quatre go. He knows Trowa's medical history."

Duo frowned. "I want to go."

Quatre slipped from Heero's arms and started to speak but was abruptly cut off by the paramedic.

"You both can go. We need to get him to the hospital _now_."

Heero cupped his boyfriend's cheeks and gave him a firm kiss.

"Go. Wufei and I will follow in the Jeep."

Quatre gave Duo a sideways glance and nodded, quickly climbing into the back of the ambulance with other boy. He watched as the medic sitting in the back readied an IV and searched for a vein on Trowa's right arm, the medic's mouth curving in a small frown. He eventually managed to start the IV, hanging a bag of saline on the pole connected to the ceiling of the ambulance.

The man grabbed a clipboard from the seat next to him, jotting down a few notes. He went back to examining Trowa, stopping when he located the boy's wallet, and plucked out the boy's driver's license. He made a surprised noise as read the boy's information, jerking his gaze up to Quatre and Duo.

"Are you sure this is _his_ license?"

The man handed the ID to Quatre and the blonde boy read over it, nodding.

"Yes, this is correct."

Duo looked over Quatre's shoulder, frowning as he read through the words written on the driver's license. It didn't make sense.

**Name**: Barton, Trina Elizabeth

**Sex**: Female

* * *

Author's Notes:

1. _Tachycardia_- In layman's terms, basically Trowa's heart is beating more rapid than it should.

2. For those of you who are wondering about what the G-boy's band actually sounds like, imagine that Saosin, Shiny Toy Guns, The Cab, and Cobra Starship (circa Viva La Cobra album) all had a giant orgy and Sandrock is their lovechild. Heh. Also, I took a bit of creative license in describing the layout of UNT. I attend a different university, and that's what I'm using as a guideline for this.

Thank you so much for reading! Any feedback/concrit is very much appreciated.


	3. Can You Keep a Secret?

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Gundam Wing (sadly), nor do I make any money by writing this. The title of this fic is taken from the song of the same name by The Academy Is…

**Warnings**: Language, shounen ai/yaoi, adult themes, FTM transgender issues, sexual content. _This chapter opens with a lime_!

Beta'd by the super fantastic The Manwell.

* * *

**Skeptics and True Believers- Chapter Three**

_Trowa sat on the couch of his apartment with his legs slightly spread, bass situated comfortably in his lap. His fingers plucked the strings effortlessly, a deep timbre resonating from the amp and through the living room. His eyes slid shut as his body relaxed into the rhythm of the music, head nodding ever so slightly as he played._

_When he finished the song and opened his eyes, a grinning Duo sat in the cloth armchair across from the couch. Trowa jerked, nearly dropping his guitar to the floor._

"_What are you doing here?"_

_Duo grinned wider and leaned forward in the chair. His red button-down shirt fell halfway undone, exposing the smooth, milky white alabaster skin of his toned chest. Trowa couldn't help but stare openly and he swallowed roughly, arousal swirling in his belly._

"_Just thought I'd stop by for a visit."_

_Duo slid out of the chair and stood up, walking over to Trowa slowly, teasingly. The longhaired man carefully took Trowa's bass from his grip and set it onto the floor. Trowa started to protest but was promptly cut off… and found himself with a lapful of Duo Maxwell. Duo wrapped his arms around the other boy's neck, his knees straddling either side of Trowa's thighs._

"_Do you have any idea just how sexy you are when you play?"_

_Duo rolled his hips forward, his clothed erection pressing against Trowa's flat crotch. Trowa's breath hitched, his own hips jerking up against the boy straddling him. Duo leaned in and caught Trowa's lips in a hot kiss. Trowa kissed back eagerly, letting his hands slide up Duo's sides in encouragement._

_Trowa felt a wet warmth building between his legs as Duo rocked against him, a soft moan escaping past his slightly parted lips and into Duo's mouth. Duo took advantage of Trowa's open mouth and deepened the kiss, eliciting a groan of approval from the boy underneath him. Their tongues fought for dominance._

_A callused hand snuck its way between their bodies and Trowa tensed as Duo popped the button of Trowa's jeans._

"_Duo, wait… I'm-"_

"_I know. Don't care." Duo tugged down the zipper and his hand slipped into the front of Trowa's boxer briefs. _

_Trowa gasped and let his head roll back against the couch as fingers teased the swollen bud of his clitoris. Pleasure surged through his body and he spread his legs as much as he could with Duo still straddling him. He arched his back and mewled wantonly, pressing himself against the nimble fingers between his legs._

_Duo's lips moved down Trowa's neck as he teased the boy's soaked folds, the other boy's moans growing louder and higher with need. Duo pressed the tip of his middle finger inside Trowa's tight opening and rubbed the pad of his thumb against the boy's clit._

"_Ah, Duo!"_

_Pleasure steadily built up in Trowa's lower belly. He squeezed his eyes shut as his hips jerked of their own accord, taking Duo's finger deeper inside him. Trowa begged for release and clutched Duo's shoulders. _

_He whimpered needily as the digit slipped out from his folds and he opened his eyes, staring up at his companion. _

"_Please!"_

_Duo's dark blue orbs swirled with anger as he slid out of Trowa's lap. He brought his slick fingers down and cupped Trowa's chin, squeezing lightly._

"_You should have trusted me."_

* * *

_March 7, 2009- 12:07 am_

Trowa slowly stirred awake, the warmth of arousal fading and replacing itself with an aching throb pulsing in the back of his skull. The images of Duo and his apartment living room disappeared, leaving darkness in their wake. Trowa's vision was slightly blurry as he cracked open his eyes. Confusion swarmed his foggy mind; he definitely wasn't at home sitting on the couch. The upper part of the small bed was elevated almost into a sitting position, pillows supporting his head, neck, and back.

"Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital."

He rubbed his right hand over his face, turning his head slightly to the left when he heard a soft baritone voice almost whisper next to the bed. Opening his eyes a little more and willing his vision to clear, he was met with violet-blue orbs. The boy sitting next to Trowa's bed looked haggard, chestnut hair falling loosely from its braid and his beautiful eyes lacking their usual luster. He was still clad in his whitewashed jeans and black V-neck tee from the concert, black eyeliner smudged just above his cheekbones, almost as if he had been crying. Worn black Converse high-top-covered feet were kicked up on a nearby chair, laces ratty and soles scuffed.

Trowa swallowed roughly as he took in his surroundings, trying to clear the remnants of the vivid dream from his mind. The lights in the room were kept dimmed and the window curtains were drawn tight, blocking out the nighttime city lights.

He tried to focus on the concert, but his memory was fuzzy; the last thing he could remember was pain piercing through his stomach while playing on stage. His gaze fell to his body, making a little gasping noise at the sight of the flimsy hospital gown he was wearing, and instinctively his hand flew to his chest.

His ace binding was gone.

He glanced sideways at Duo and started to panic. _He knew_. There was no doubt in Trowa's mind that Duo knew his secret. How could he not?

"Duo…"

Duo stood up from his chair and yanked a hand roughly through his messy bangs. "I'll go tell the nurse you woke up."

Before Trowa could say anything, Duo was out the door. Trowa withdrew into himself and curled his fingers tightly into the covers draped over his lap. His shoulders shook as he struggled to hold onto his composure, a whirlwind of emotions circling through his system. He knew that Duo was upset with him, maybe even pissed, and knowing that it was his own damn fault for being in this situation made Trowa feel sick to his stomach.

When the door swung open again, Trowa jerked his head up from staring at his lap and glanced over to the direction of the flooding bright light. A middle-aged female nurse stepped into the room, "foaming in" with the foam hand sanitizer connected to the wall and rubbing her hands together as she stepped over to the bed. She smiled warmly and plucked up the chart on the wall beside Trowa's bed.

"Hi Trowa, I'm Mary and I'll be your nurse for tonight."

Trowa nodded and watched as Mary took his vitals, making notes as she went along. When she was finished, she sat down on the stool next to his bed by the chart holder, pen and clipboard still in hand.

"Alright sweetie, I need to ask you some questions. Your blonde friend was able to fill out most of your medical history, but there are still a few, more personal questions that I didn't think you'd feel comfortable with him talking about."

She smiled softly as she noticed Trowa glance at the door leading out to the hall.

"Don't worry, that boy with the braid won't come in until I leave."

Trowa made a face and shifted a little in his bed, trying to make himself a little more comfortable on the stiff hospital mattress. He already had a feeling as to what kind of questions he'd be answering.

"Okay."

Mary flipped a few pages of his chart and clicked open her pen.

"When did you start your period?"

"Tuesday morning."

The nurse nodded, taking careful notes on Trowa's chart as he spoke. Most of the questions were fairly basic, like when he started transitioning, what his dosage of testosterone was, and when he'd last been to a gynecologist. He answered the questions with minimal interaction. He knew that Mary wouldn't judge him, hell she'd probably seen crazier cases rolling in through the emergency room on a daily basis, but it didn't change how uncomfortable he felt telling a stranger the most intimate details about his body.

"Okay honey, one last question. When was the last time you had sexual intercourse?"

Trowa's eyes turned to saucers and he felt his face flush a bright crimson, instantly remembering the intense dream he had just woken up from.

He was not expecting _that_ to be asked.

"Uh… I'm a virgin."

Mary nodded and made a quick note before turning the chart back to its top page, giving Trowa a soft smile.

"Okay, now that that's all out of the way, I bet you're wondering what caused you to faint, hm?"

The boy sitting in bed nodded and drew his blankets closer.

"Well, we ran a preliminary blood panel. You're highly anemic from the menstrual bleeding, and you're also pretty dehydrated. We're going to give you some iron supplements and keep you on an IV for a few hours so that your body can get the fluids it needs. Also, when you fell you cracked your head pretty good. You have a very mild concussion, but along with the anemia and dehydration the doctor wants to keep you overnight. In the morning, the attending will run a complete blood workup and give your current physician a call to let her know what happened. Doctor Sally Po, correct?"

Trowa nodded slowly, only really half-listening to what Mary had to say. His hands were curled into fists in his lap, his nails digging into his palms. He hated himself for pushing his limits so far. If he had just listened to Quatre, he wouldn't be in this damn predicament.

The nurse stood up from her stool and returned Trowa's chart to the plastic holder, clipping her pen to the breast pocket of her scrub top and giving the boy a warm smile.

"Your blood pressure is still too high for my liking, so I'll be back to check on you again in an hour. If you need anything before then, just press the call button on the remote connected to your bed and I'll be right in."

Mary left the room, sanitizing her hands on the way out, and Trowa slumped back against his pillows. He let his eyes slip shut while he waited for the sound of his hospital room door to click closed. As soon as the door shut, he immediately tugged up his blankets and bunched them around his chest.

Trowa was relieved to have a moment alone to himself, but that relief was quickly taken away when was heard the turning of the doorknob and a soft scuffle of feet make their way to his bed.

When he opened his lids again, Trowa's dark green eyes were met with cobalt. Duo sank back down into the chair he had occupied earlier. The boy looked just as rumpled as before, but wore an unreadable expression on his face.

"How you feeling, buddy?"

Trowa shrugged weakly and attempted to give Duo a little smile.

"Sore, but okay. Where're the guys?"

Duo slumped his shoulders and rested his chin on his right hand. "Wuffers is on the phone with someone downstairs. A guy, I think. Q-ball and Heero are in the waiting room."

Trowa let his gaze fall to his lap as an awkward silence fell between the two. He knew he needed to talk to Duo about what made him pass out—about the secret he'd kept hidden from the boy with the long braid for so long. Part of him clung to the hope that maybe Duo didn't really know, that Quatre had been able to keep him from finding everything out from Mary. But wishing aside, Trowa wasn't stupid or naïve; he knew that even if Duo miraculously didn't know what was different about him, he'd still have to tell him eventually.

Trowa glanced up when he heard a throat clear.

"So…" Duo started and shoved his hands into his front side pockets. He kept his blue eyes focused on the wall to Trowa's right, refusing to make eye contact. Trowa's gaze searched Duo's posture for any possible clue as to what was going through his mind. His body language read clear to Trowa: Duo was nervous and slightly agitated. Duo reached for one of his back pockets, fingers fumbling slightly, and he pulled out a small piece of plastic.

"Here."

When Trowa realized what it was that Duo was handing him—his driver's license—Trowa's entire body grew rigid with tension. He dropped his hand in his lap, staring blankly at the ID.

"Y'know, uh, just in case I gave you the wrong impression when we first met, liars don't _really_ turn me on."

Irritation crept into Duo's voice, despite his obvious efforts to keep a level head. Trowa flinched; he couldn't blame Duo for being angry. He took a deep breath, struggling to stay calm.

"That doesn't mean you want to hear the truth."

Trowa watched sideways from the corner of his eye as Duo shifted in his chair and crossed his arms.

"Actually, yeah, it does." Duo paused for a moment before sighing and finally turning his gaze to Trowa. "I'm not gonna ask, but if you've got something to say, now would be the time."

Trowa dropped the plastic ID on his lap and fisted his hands in his blankets.

"Duo-"

Trowa cut himself off as the door to his room slid open, eyes hesitantly meeting aquamarine as Quatre quickly made his way over to the hospital bed with Heero trailing behind him. The blonde boy carefully pulled Trowa into a hug.

"Thank god you're okay. You scared us half to death!"

When Quatre pulled back, Trowa could see the damp sheen in the other boy's eyes. _Shit_.

"Quatre, I'm sorry. I should've listened to you."

"Damn right you should have, Barton."

Wufei leaned against the bare wall closest to the door, wrapped up in a dark purple hoodie that was way too big for his compact body but looked strikingly familiar. Trowa made a mental note to ask him about that later.

With a frustrated whine, Duo climbed out of the chair he'd been sprawled out in.

"I'll see you later, Trowa."

Trowa watched as Duo started to stomp off, the rubber soles of his worn out high-tops squeaking across the tile floor. Wufei stepped in front of Duo, successfully blocking him from leaving the room.

"Your car's still at school, Maxwell."

Duo pursed his lips and begrudgingly looked at Heero.

"Can you give me a lift?"

* * *

_March 7, 2009- 3:19 am_

Trowa was lying on his side facing away from the door, staring vacantly at the muted TV as he rubbed at the spot on his arm where his IV had been removed. His mind raced a mile a minute, going over everything that had happened between him and Duo a few hours ago—and everything that _hadn't_. There was so much that he wanted to say—but couldn't have said—to the other man. But he hadn't mustered up the courage.

Heero and Quatre had long since left, Heero opting to stay at their apartment with his boyfriend rather than his campus dorm room. Wufei had chosen to stay the night at the hospital with Trowa, only having disappeared a few minutes ago to pick up some food a friend of his was dropping off.

So, Trowa was left to his own devices. He felt miserable and embarrassed and wanted to cry; he should have listened to Quatre when he had told him to take it easy.

He felt a tear start to trickle down from one of his eyes and brushed it away quickly. _Men don't cry_, he told himself over and over. But that first tear quickly led to a second and then a third, and he couldn't stop the wetness rolling down his cheeks. Trowa scrubbed a trembling hand over his face, a quiet sob escaping from his throat.

"Pathetic."

"Yes, Maxwell is."

"I meant me."

"You are not."

Trowa felt the weight of his bed shift and suddenly a hand was resting on his back, rubbing in gentle circles. He relaxed into the touch and found himself letting go of the control he had desperately tried to cling to, sobbing brokenly.

A compact body settled behind him in a spooning position and a strong tan arm wrapped itself around his waist. There was hardly any room to maneuver in the tiny hospital bed, but Trowa managed to roll onto his other side, coming face-to-face with his Chinese friend.

The look of understanding on Wufei's face was enough for Trowa to wrap a quivering arm around the other boy and bury his face in the side of his neck. Wufei didn't say anything; he didn't need to.

Slowly the tears began to slow and Trowa's sobs turned into muffled hiccups against the fabric of Wufei's shirt. Reluctantly, Trowa pulled back enough to wipe at his face. He felt exhausted, both emotionally and physically. He couldn't remember the last time he'd cried like that, and now he was a mess. His nose was stuffy and his eyes swollen, not to mention his already throbbing head felt like it was going to explode.

"Sorry."

Wufei leaned over Trowa and grabbed the small travel-size box of tissue, plucking out a few sheets and handing them to the brunette.

"Everyone's allowed to have a breakdown once in a while."

Trowa gave his friend a weak smile as he cleaned himself up and blew his nose. They both settled back against the bed, Trowa situating himself against Wufei's firm chest.

"Thanks for staying, 'Fei."

Wufei grunted softly in response and closed his eyes, hooking his arm loosely around Trowa's waist.

"There's sandwiches and chips on the table, if you're hungry."

Trowa carefully shook his head, mindful of the pain pulsing through his skull. Food definitely wasn't an option right now. His nausea was starting to come back, though he wasn't sure if it was from his headache or from how things had gone with Duo.

"Hey Barton?"

Trowa cracked an eye open to look at his friend. "Hm?"

"Just say the word and I'll break his face."

Trowa couldn't help but laugh, however weak it sounded.

"Thanks."

* * *

_March 7, 2009- 8:30 am_

Trowa woke up to the sound of feet shuffling across the tile floor. His body was spooned around Wufei's and his face was pressed against a warm, cotton-covered shoulder. He didn't know how they had managed to tangle themselves up like that in the tiny hospital bed, but damn, Trowa was comfy and didn't want to move.

"Time to wake up, sleepyhead," a quiet tenor voice spoke as a warm hand lightly touched Trowa's back. Trowa grunted in response and burrowed further into Wufei and his blankets.

"G'way, Quat, 'm sleepin'."

Quatre laughed and sat himself down in the chair closest to the bed. "Sure looks comfy over there. Think there's room for one more?"

"Hell no, Winner," Wufei yawned out and scrubbed a hand over his face. A muffled laugh escaped Trowa as Wufei shifted against him but didn't pull away from their embrace. "What time is it?"

Quatre hummed and checked his cell phone. "Just after half past eight. Trowa, I packed you a light travel bag with some comfy clothes for you to change into whenever the doctor releases you. Oh, and Heero's grabbing some coffee and doughnuts from downstairs for everyone."

Trowa made a face at the mention of food, his insides still flip-flopping. The pain in his head had dimmed to a dull ache overnight surprisingly enough, but he still felt weak and a little dizzy. Carefully, Trowa pulled himself away from Wufei and attempted to sit up.

"Hey Quatre, can you help me to the bathroom?"

The blonde teen was out of his seat and standing by Trowa's side of the bed in a heartbeat, grasping the other boy's hands and easing him from the bed. In a tangle of stumbling limbs, eventually Quatre was able to guide Trowa into the bathroom. He stepped out of the bathroom and shut the door, giving the other boy privacy to clean himself up.

Trowa clicked the lock on the handle and slumped against the heavy door. Everything from the previous night came crashing back at once—the concert, the dream, Duo, Trowa's own nervous breakdown—and Trowa just wanted to disappear. He could've avoided the whole situation with Duo if he had just told him he was transitioning when they first met. Even if Duo hadn't accepted him, Trowa could've handled that bit of disappointment. But now that he'd had the chance at forging a friendship with the other boy, he was terrified at how much he could lose.

Carefully Trowa moved away from the door and eased himself into a sitting position on the closed toilet lid. With a sigh he rubbed his forehead, letting his eyes slip shut. The more he thought about Duo, the more he began to question how he truly felt about the longhaired boy. It was more than a simple attraction—Trowa genuinely cared about Duo. But at the same time, the feelings he had were stronger than that of a friend.

_Come on Barton, pull your shit together_, Trowa mentally chided himself and rested a hand under his chin, propping his elbow up on his knee. He needed to resolve things with Duo, and he needed to do it fast. The last thing he wanted was for Duo to jump to his own premature conclusions and shut Trowa out completely.

Trowa decided that he would let Duo have the rest of the day to think things over and then he'd call him the next morning. That'd give Trowa enough time to think everything through and figure out how to approach the topic of his transitioning.

By the time he staggered out of the washroom, Wufei was out of the tiny bed and sitting in a chair next to Heero, both boys nursing their cups of coffee. Trowa slowly trudged his way back to the dreaded hospital bed with Quatre hot on his heals.

* * *

The morning passed mostly in a blur; Trowa's day-shift nurse came by every so often to check his vitals and the attending resident was waiting for the results from the complete blood workup to come in. Heero and Quatre left for their late-morning classes at ten, and like the previous night Wufei chose to stay and try to keep Trowa's spirits up.

Wufei sat next to Trowa and dealt out a game of Old Maid on the adjustable bed-table hovering over the bed-ridden boy's lap. Trowa's concentration on the game wasn't the best, but it did help take his mind of off Duo.

"You know, Cathy's still listed as your emergency contact for the hospital," Wufei whispered as he plucked a card from Trowa's hand.

Trowa jerked his gaze from his cards and narrowed his eyes a little. "She has no business being called. I don't want her to have anything to do with this."

Wufei sighed. "I know. Winner tried to take care of it when you were still knocked out, but the doctor wouldn't budge."

_Great. Another thing for me to worry about_.

"She's not flying in from New York, is she?" Trowa kept his eyes trained on Wufei as he drew a card.

Wufei diverted his eyes and gave a slight nod of his head, earning a loud curse from his companion. "You should be released by the time she gets into town, Barton. You _don't_ have to see her."

"She won't leave me alone until she gets her chance to lecture me. _Fuck_." Trowa yanked a hand roughly through his messy hair, hissing as the ache in his head grew sharper. His day was going just _fantastically_.

A knock to the hospital room door jerked Trowa from his thoughts and he watched as the attending resident, Doctor Noin, walked over. She wore a soft smile as she greeted the boys and sanitized her hands.

"Well, your blood results are in, kiddo. Would you prefer me to go over the results with you privately, or are you comfortable with your friend staying?"

Trowa glanced at Wufei and gave Noin a little smile. "No, he can stay."

"Okay." Noin hummed as she flipped through the pages attached to her clipboard and sat down on the rolling stool on the opposite side of the bed. "So, like Mary discussed with you late last night, your preliminary results showed that you were very anemic. After comparing the new results with your past records that Doctor Po faxed over this morning, I can tell you that your iron levels tend to run lower than normal. I'm going to prescribe you a high dosage iron supplement that I want you to take for the next seven days. After that, I suggest you take a standard slow-release 45-milligram supplement once a day. That dosage you can buy at your local pharmacy pretty cheaply."

Noin paused a moment, letting the information sink in. "As well as the anemia, the blood tests also showed that the testosterone you're on has mildly suppressed your blood clotting factors. Now, with Female-to-Male transitioning and testosterone use it's not that uncommon, but you do need to be careful whenever you get injured."

The doctor stood up from the stool and gave Trowa a warm smile. "Alright Trowa, I'm going to go process your discharge paperwork and write out a 'script for the iron tablets, so you can get dressed. And _please_, make an appointment with Po when you get home. I'll be back in about half an hour, and then you'll be free to go."

_Free to go_. Ironic. If anything, he still felt trapped—or at least he would until he could sit down with Duo and lay everything out in the open.

Trowa didn't realize that the doctor had left until a pile of clothes flopped into his lap. Wufei arched a brow at him and moved the table away from the bed.

"Get dressed, Barton. I'll be back, I'm gonna go downstairs and call someone to pick us up." Wufei didn't elaborate any further before walking out of the room and shutting the door behind him.

With a shrug, Trowa looked at the clothes Wufei had given him to change into. Quatre had been nice enough to bring him his favorite pair of pj pants and a loose cotton t-shirt that would draw attention away from his unbound chest.

When Wufei came back up to the room Trowa was fully dressed, just waiting to put on his shoes. Trowa gave his friend a soft smile.

"So, who's picking us up?"

A soft blush touched Wufei's cheeks and he shoved his hands into his jean pockets. "I, uh, have been seeing someone."

Trowa's eyes widened. "Whoa, really? Who?"

Wufei ducked his head. "You'll see when he gets here."

Trowa snorted in amusement but let the topic drop; it was almost unheard of for Wufei to be flustered. And after everything that had happened in the last 18 hours, it was nice to see someone else looking nervous for a change.

Noin steered in an empty wheelchair and handed Trowa a small stack of papers. "Just need your John Hancock on a few places and then you're all set to go. I also made copies of everything so you have them for your records along with your prescription."

Everything signed and belongings in tow, Trowa settled into the wheelchair and was pushed out of the room and headed downstairs to the lobby. An expensive grey SUV sat waiting just outside the hospital entrance and a man with long blonde hair leaned against the car, apparently waiting to open the rear passenger door.

Trowa did a double take as Wufei led them in the waiting car's direction, eyes widening at the sight of the man.

"…Merquise?"

Why the hell was Trowa's US History professor's teaching assistant picking him and Wufei up?

* * *

Author's Notes: I have a Tumblr now! Visit insideitspages . tumblr (take out the spaces) for updates on STB, as well as flailings and various other fun stuff.

Feedback is very much appreciated!


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